Tuesday, June 19, 2007

Why Men Are Happier


Men Are Just Happier People-- What do you expect from such simple creatures?
Your last name stays put.
The garage is all yours.
Wedding plans take care of themselves.
Chocolate is just another snack.
You can never be pregnant.
You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park.
You can wear NO shirt to a water park.
Car mechanics tell you the truth.
The world is your urinal.
You never have to drive to another petrol station toilet because this one is just too icky.
You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
Same work, more pay.
Wrinkles add character.
Wedding dress £2000. Tux rental-£100.
People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them.
The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected.
New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
One mood all the time.
Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
You know stuff about tanks.
A five-day holiday requires only one suitcase.
You can open all your own jars.
You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.
Your underwear is £4.95 for a three-pack.
Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
You almost never have strap problems in public.
You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.
Everything on your face stays its original colour.
The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
You only have to shave your face and neck.
You can play with toys all your life.
One wallet and one pair of shoes one colour for all seasons.
You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.
You can "do" your nails with a pocket knife.
You have freedom of choice concerning growing a moustache..
You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.
No wonder men are happier.

6 comments:

Ilva said...

I love it Di, just love it! But are they really?

Queenie said...

That is so true, well done you for reminding me!!!

Anonymous said...

What a fabulous list-this is my DH in a nutshell-and he's wonderfully happy!

Gypsy Purple said...

Hillarious!!!!!

Anonymous said...

This made me laugh out loud, especially the Christmas shopping one as this could be my husband! I must also tell you that your blog is one of my favourites - not only do you have exquisite taste but you have a refreshing sense of humour and are not in the least pretentious. Rather than me be anonymous - I have a blog at: http://naturespaintbox.wordpress.com and I have "borrowed" some of your wonderful artistic finds on my blog - I hope that you don't mind too much.

Kind regards,

Lesley (nature's paint box)

P.S. You DO look like Joanna Lumley!

Anonymous said...

Agree with everything here :)

Did you read Jenny's blog contest this week? 'explain what you love about being a woman': http://www.jennyvorwaller.com/blog/?p=1170#comments